


Dear my Past Lover

by YuiEnoshima



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: But was it really all that happened, F/F, Keith cheats, M/M, Still unsure if I want the, m to end up together, oh well
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-13
Updated: 2018-03-13
Packaged: 2019-03-30 21:01:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,415
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13959936
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YuiEnoshima/pseuds/YuiEnoshima





	Dear my Past Lover

AU: Where Keith is a writer and has written a book that has notes to his one true love. 

Lance found his way into the bookstore, his heart set on finding something to read at Allura’s engagement party that was being held later that night. Pidge had been planning it for months, going over how she wanted to mix both the Altean family and the Galra families usual aesthetic so that they could truly be the ones to finally bring the fighting to an end. They were just like Romeo and Juliet, he remembered her gushing at one point. Without the dying though, she would ramble afterward, clearly flustered. He honestly didn't know how she did it, she'd been in love with Allura from the first time they met and now she was planning her engagement party. Poor girl. He could never do that for any of his exes.

Especially his high school love, Keith Kogane.

A boy he’d dated through his high school years, his first love. Yeah, you get the point. Not someone he ever wanted to see again.

Unfortunately,  Allura had disagreed and invited him no matter how many times he begged. Life truly was cruel.  

So here he was, finding a book that he could hide in at the party—preferably far, far away from the person who tore his heart into pieces. 

 His fingers ran over the hardcover stories, admiring the feel under his palm. The smooth texture taking over his senses, instantly calming him. 

 

A few stood out to him but nothing quite jumped like the novel he saw across the room.

You know that feeling when you see someone from across the room and just know? Just know that they are meant to be a part of your life in some way? Well, that’s how Lance felt.

This book just called out to him, beckoning him to open it as he shuffled towards the shelf it was stored on.

Dear my lover of the past by Paladin Red

Opening the cover was an interesting feeling, it was like all he could think at that moment was how his heart couldn’t stop racing.

 Lance looked away, going back to the book and reading the first paragraph.

What is love exactly? Is it when your heart can’t calm down around someone. No, that’s nerves. Is it when everything in your body is on fire? No, that’s lust. So what is love then? To me, love is when you can stand beside this person and imagine a future with them without even blinking. It’s when you put time and effort into just being able to see them, hold them. It’s standing beside someone whether they annoy the hell out of you. It’s wanting to help the person that has become so vulnerable around you. It’s…a friendship. That has turned into so much more…

 I like to say I had countless of relationships in my lifetime like these but only two other’s ever came close to what I experienced for the first time. So without going into to much detail, I’ll just let you read the rest.

Letter 1:

_It’s been a day since we broke up since I cheated on you with none other than my best friend. If you only knew how sorry I was for doing something like that, for enjoying the feeling of another man’s hands on my skin…for._

_He shut the book. His mind reeling from that first couple of sentences._

He knew what night it was referring to, the night Lance had come over to check on him. They were seventeen when it happened when he opened the door to see Shiro touching him in ways he couldn’t. God, it hurt remembering shit like that. The stuff he had desperately tried to forget, opening this book again is seriously going to hurt. But, maybe it will help him move on?

He slammed the book on the counter, paid and then left. Dreading what the night could potentially have in store for him.

_For…touching him back. It was an exhilarating feeling, it was dangerous. It was exactly what I needed at the time. Let me emphasize the at the time, at the time I was drunk—intoxicated and intrigued. Does it mean I didn’t love you? No. I did love you, I do love you? Honestly, the past two years were amazing but along the way, I started to feel trapped. This was meant to be an apology letter…but I guess it just proves you were right to dump me. Fuck this. Night._

Letter 2:

I _t’s been a week. My stomach lurches every time I see you. It’s almost as if my body thinks you were the one who cheated. It was me though, I know that. Remember how I said I enjoyed the touches my best friend left on me? Now every time I think of them, my skin itches, my mind blanks and I have to fight every urge not to scrub my skin clean. Y’ know I found out that one of the jocks had drugged our friend, she was crying so much the next day—it’s been a week now and she’s just called me up because she’s pregnant. I’m about to take her to her parent house and help her get through it. God, I wish you were here. This is something that you would be better at handling, why she came to me I have no clue. We barely even talk. The point was. The only drink I had that night was from her cup. She handed it to me after she got distracted with one of the boys and I DRANK IT. I guess that’d just be seen as an excuse though because …I mean I allowed someone to touch me regardless of my drug heighten. So I guess it was my fault? I just don’t know anymore... Gotta go, she’s here._

Pregnant huh? Someone they both were friends with him. Wait. Was it Ezora? A bright bubbly smile entered his mind then and he imagined her long high ponytail. It had to have been her. But what did this all mean? Lance shuffled to the next letter as he entered the Holts household.

Letter 3:

I _t’s been a month now. The school has been crazy with finals week. Fuck, I miss you so much. I’m a little bit intoxicated right now, to be honest. I was just making out with Pidgeon, we’ve become fuck buddies somehow. I don’t think she knows that I slept with her brother HA. Isn’t that funny? Bloody hilarious it is. Ugh, why am I writing in this stupid thing again? Ah, that’s right because I’m still in love with the guy I cheated on and he’s moved on with some random guy. Or maybe he’s just a friend. Who does fucking know at this point? You know, you would think that having a girls hand on your dick would make you feel better in an instant. It doesn’t. It just makes you miss the person that was always too nervous to make a move like that. UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH FUCK THIS IT’S 12 AM AND I HAVE 4 ESSAYS TO DO BEFORE THE END OF THE WEEK BYE._

Pidge entered his line of sight, pulling the book from his hand and reading over a couple of lines. Her expression showing no reaction to what she read until of course, she got onto the line of her and then she was pissed. So pissed in fact that when she saw Keith enter the room she just walked out. To be fair. He would do the same thing. He pulled up a chair, going back to the book curious what the next letter would talk about.

Letter 4:

_My best friend hasn't spoken to me in months after what happened between us. Though I think its the both of us who have acted upon that idea. Every time we see each other, we practically run the other way. We still don't know what came over us that day, we were practically bro's, there was no sexual tension between us. NO ONE HAD FEELINGS. So seriously what the fuck happened? My mind keeps wandering back to that night, it re-collects small things and then everything else is fuzzy. Not a good fuzzy though._

Lance shut the book again, slightly confused as puzzle pieces formed in his head. What the fuck happened that night? 


End file.
